A Difficult Transition: Emptying Your Childhood Home

Posted on: March 5th, 2014 by Cathy Mendler No Comments

Cathy MendlerIt’s March! 

Even though it’s the beginning of March, it’s still not looking like spring is just around the corner with all of the snow that’s still on the ground. But don’t let that stop you from forging ahead with your plans for this year.

Let’s get started and turn over another leaf! 

EMPTYING YOUR CHILDHOOD HOME

Emptying your childhood home is one of life’s more difficult transitions. Whether your parents are moving to an apartment, a retirement residence or a nursing home–or they have passed away–here are some tips to assist you.

If possible, let your parents be in control. Put yourself in their shoes, and remember that it is their home. The process will run more smoothly if you respect their wishes.

Planning

Have a plan, and start as early as possible. Don’t expect your parents to clear out their entire house in a couple of weeks. The process takes time, as well as a great deal of energy and patience. Keep your parents’ energy level in mind.

Respect Feelings

Be empathetic. Did they grow up during the depression when possessions were scarce? Realizing that possessions are not worth very much now from a monetary point of view is an unfortunate reality. Often they have far more sentimental value.

Disposal of Possessions

Are there items that children and grandchildren find particularly meaningful to them? Schedule a family meeting. If someone doesn’t want or need items, don’t make them feel guilty. Nowadays, most people don’t want the maintenance that comes along with grandmother’s silver tea service.

Sorting through items will likely evoke many memories, and it’s common for seniors to share those stories. It’s a necessary part of the process and will help them let go. The more meaningful an item, the harder it may be. It’s often easier to let an item go if they know someone else will make good use of it. No one likes the idea of their possessions being discarded. Items that are worth money can be sold or donated.

Avoid packing items in a box and storing them in a basement. It’s not a good way to honour the memory of a loved one. In addition, it will prevent someone from dealing with the items again at a later date.

Remember–letting go of someone’s possessions does not mean you are letting go of that person. The memory of a loved one lives in your head and in your heart.

February is Heart Month

Posted on: February 27th, 2014 by Cathy Mendler No Comments

After spending a couple of days at the hospital with a friend whose husband had multiple bypasssurgery, I thought I’d remind everyone that

February is Heart Month.

How healthy is your heart?

Would you recognize the 5 warning signs if you or a loved one was having a stroke?  Stroke can be treated. That’s why it is so important to recognize and respond to the warning signs.

Learn your risk level for a stroke by taking the Heart&Stroke Risk Assessment.

To learn more about heart-related issues, check out the Heart and Stroke Foundation of Canada’s website.

 

It’s never too late to make healthier choices!

News and events for February 2014

Posted on: February 25th, 2014 by Cathy Mendler No Comments

Events and News

 

 What’s Happening?  Click Here

Check out this “Healthful” website!

Posted on: February 20th, 2014 by Cathy Mendler No Comments

Get Checking...

 

Check Out This Website!

Be a smart consumer!  Get recalls and safety alerts on health and consumer products, food and vehicles.  Check out this important website.

 

Action Habits for Entrepreneurs

Posted on: February 18th, 2014 by Cathy Mendler No Comments

 

deborah-plouffe (125 x 142).jpg

“Get going. Move forward. Aim High. Plan a takeoff. Don’t just sit on the runwayand hope someone will come along and push theairplane. It simply won’t happen. Change your attitude and gain some altitude. Believe me, you’ll love it up here.” – Donald Trump

 

How was YOUR year in 2013? Are you looking forward to 2014, or bogged down by dwelling on all the things left undone? Being in business for yourself can be a long, tough haul–especially in the early stages of entrepreneurship.

Keep in mind that your most powerful resource as an entrepreneur is your OWN mind. You alone will decide whether you will allow yourself to be torn down by fear and doubt OR allow yourself to surge forward with new ideas and create something wonderful! The best cure for the unmotivated mind is almost always action. Whenever you feel unmotivated, the very best remedy is to do something every day to move forward and to build your business.

Here are a few of the most important action habits that we can adopt to move ourselves and our business forward to the next level.

Be a doer, not a “do not-er.” Take a step–any step that will propel you forward. It doesn’t matter whether it’s a giant step or a baby step, as long as it is taken in the right direction.

Don’t wait for conditions to be ideal. There will always be barriers and obstacles in the way. Face them as they come up, but don’t let them stop you from getting started.

Do what you fear. There’s a better place on the other side of your fears, and the only way to get there is going through the action that you fear.

Celebrate your successes. Set small and achieveable goals that will keep you motivated to move forward, and make it a point to reward your accomplishments. Don’t forget about those huge, dreamy goals, though.

Slow and steady wins the race. Study the masters and make notes of what motivated them, as well as what characteristics led them to achieve greatness. Do your best to emulate and adopt these qualities, which probably include things like passion, self-discipline, integrity and hard work.

Remember that motivation is the often the result of action (NOT the other way around). The very best way to get yourself moving toward accomplishing your goals is…to get yourself moving!

Deborah Plouffe is the founder and CEO of rewriter.ca, a business dedicated to helping YOU to find the words YOU need to say! 

Success is a Series of Habits…

Posted on: February 13th, 2014 by Cathy Mendler No Comments

Get Productive...

Jacquelyn Smith of Forbes Magazine wrote two articles which contain a number of great suggestions. Remember–to be successful, it’s best if you try to establish one or two new habits at a time.

16 Things You Should Do At The Start Of Every Work Day

16 Things You Should Do At The End Of Every Work Day

What will you change to become more productive in 2014?

Timeless Wisdom from Mark Twain

Posted on: February 11th, 2014 by Cathy Mendler No Comments

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the things you did.” – Mark Twain

A Few Notes on Compulsive Hoarding

Posted on: February 4th, 2014 by Cathy Mendler No Comments

 

Cathy MendlerIt’s February already! 

With the winter we’ve experienced so far this year, I think it’s safe to say that the snow and cold weather won’t be gone any time soon–despite whether the groundhog did or didn’t see his shadow.

Remember to add snow shovelling and extra driving time to your schedule as needed. But don’t let the cold weather deter you from your important tasks!

So let’s get started and turn over another leaf! 

COMPULSIVE HOARDING

When I tell people I’m a professional organizer, the conversation inevitably gets around to the topic of hoarding. This month I’d like to clarify some misconceptions about this topic.

With the popularity of programs such as A&E’s The Hoarders and TLC’sHoarding: Buried Alive, this once taboo subject is now seeing the light of day.The Hoarders begins each episode with the statement “more than 3 million people are compulsive hoarders.” This is an estimate only, as there is no accurate way of knowing the actual number.

Definition of Hoarding

When people tell me they know someone who is a hoarder, I caution them to be careful how they use the term “hoarder.” Many people are very quick to pass judgment or jump to conclusions about the people in these scenarios. Keep in mind that these episodes are real-life situations. It can be difficult and/or heartbreaking to watch. Understanding and compassion are needed by these people.

A&E provides the following definition: “Compulsive hoarding is a mental disorder marked by an obsessive need to acquire and keep things, even if the items are worthless, hazardous, or unsanitary.”

The Fairfax County, Virginia government provided the following information on their website:

“Hoarding is not limited to any age, race, gender or nationality. Hoarding behavior can begin early in life but is more prevalent in older adults. Hoarders can be of any educational or socio-economic level. They are unaware that their living circumstances pose a danger to themselves and to others. They are unable to change unsafe conditions on their own.”

Signs of Hoarding

Geralin Thomas, a professional organizer who has appeared on The Hoarders,advises that the signs of hoarding may include:

    • “Extreme [acquisition] and storage of items in the home and in the yard
    • Accumulation of combustible materials
    • Blocked exits (doors/windows)
    • Narrow pathways in the home
    • Rat and/or insect infestations
    • Rotting food and/or used food containers
    • Human and/or animal waste
    • Long-term neglect of home maintenance
  • Non-working utilities, such as heat, running water, sewer, refrigeration”

Hoarding Situations

Unsafe living conditions can be discovered by emergency personnel such as police, fire and paramedics. Neighbours will sometimes report a person to authorities because their yard has become an eyesore.

In a number of episodes, the hoarder has been reported to authorities. It is not uncommon for them to live in fear of being evicted or having their children removed from the home.

What NOT To Do

A common misperception is that hoarders are lazy or just can’t be bothered. Geralin strongly emphasizes that a hoarder “can’t do” it, not “won’t do” it.

Clearing out the clutter will not solve the problem if the underlying root cause is not being dealt with in the proper manner. The hoarder must make the decisions about what will remain in the living space and what will be removed. It is not uncommon for people living with a hoarder to make the situation worse. Irreparable harm can be done to relationships.

The best thing you can do is encourage a suspected hoarder to seek professional help. Do not attempt to handle this type of situation by yourself, or with the help of family members, unless you are qualified.

Treatment

In 2013 the 5th edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders defined compulsive hoarding as a distinct disorder within the chapter about obsessive-compulsive and related disorders.

A group of people (including socialservice workers, psychological/mental health professionals, professional organizers, etc.) may need to be assembled to determine and provide the required treatment. Successful treatment can include cognitive behavioural therapy combined with the use of medication. Often a hoarder does not comprehend that they have a problem. It is extremely important to realize that not everyone is willing to accept help or treatment.

Education

The Institute for Challenging Disorganization (ICD) in the United States is a non-profit educational organization whose mission is “to provide education, research and strategies to benefit people challenged by chronic disorganization.” ICD developed a Clutter-Hoarding Scale with Levels I-V on a continuum. This scale “is an assessment measurement tool . . . to give professional organizers and related professionals definitive parameters.” For more information, please go to their website, and click on the Resources tab.

If you or someone you love is looking for help, contact me and I can direct you to local professionals for assistance. Communities are starting to establish task forces to deal with hoarding issues.

Online Support Groups

Children of Hoarders – support for those who grew up in a hoarding environment and/or currently have a relative who hoards. Many resources, online videos, shared stories and more are provided.

Squalor Survivors – stories, photos, tools, community forums and chat, resources and information for people who know someone who hoards

Recipe for Yummy Ginger Pumpkn Soup!

Posted on: January 30th, 2014 by Cathy Mendler No Comments

I made this Ginger Pumpkin Soup for dinner with our neighbours on New Year’s Eve.  The recipe is from GoodLife Fitness newsletter.

It’s never too late to make healthier choices!

What’s New for 2014?

Posted on: January 28th, 2014 by Cathy Mendler No Comments

What’s Happening?  Click Here

 

Events and News